The Contra Costa County Small Business Community

Who are you Being?

February 6th, 2010

I was recently approached by someone in a networking group I was visiting who wanted advice for handling a somewhat delicate situation. He had overheard something that disturbed him which was said by another member of this group.

In this person’s zeal and passion for solving the problem she solved, she was using language that could potentially offend the very people who need her help the most!

What’s worse is, she was overheard by others, who might have potentially been clients, but now will not because they felt what was said was offensive.

“Nobody wants to do business with Lazy People, that’s why they need me.” is what was said.

<<ouch>>

I am not going to get into a long discussion about how other people can’t make anyone feel a certain way, but I will say this. On of the  gold nuggets I’ve picked up along the way is that your reaction comes from inside.  I’ll prove it.  If you are a thin person who is completely satisfied with your weight and someone walked up to you and said, “wow, you’re fat” you would think they were wrong (or jealous) and blow off the comment. That same comment said to someone who believes they are fat (whether or not they actually are) would most likely create a response of hurt and shame in the person who is trying to lose weight.  Same comment, different results.

That being said (and setting that totally aside for a moment) Language is so important.

Had our original “anti lazy person’s” goal been to weed out lazy people from her client base, that would have been one thing. But instead it was her perception of the demographic of her target market – The very people she wanted to reach.

Lest you think this was a “bad person,” she was passionate about her craft. She felt being lazy was a life and death situation because her experience of it was that this was true. In fact her mother was a “lazy person” and as a result had a horribly messy house which resulted in her isolation as an older person and eventual death because no one ever visited, she injured herself and no one was there to help.

So her motivation was very noble. The language, not so much.

Nor was this person an unsaavy marketer. At every networking event during the introductions she did a good job of describing what she did.

Most likely, the problem came from not really understanding what her target market is thinking and only seeing the problem she solved for them from her point of view.

Who she was being was not aligned with who would attract her perfect client. And that explained perfectly why she was struggling to find business.

Remember, that marketing and networking is more than just the problem you solve, who your niche may be and the words that come out of your mouth.  To be of most service to your target market is to develop the kind of “beside manner” that they would appreciate most. Remember platinum beats gold every time The platinum rule is treat your clients how THEY would like to be treated – NOT as you would want to be treated.

Learn who your ideal clients are.  Learn to describe them as just a single person. You might even want to give your niche a proper name like Betty, or Michael.

Once you understand how they think, feel and talk and what motivates them – and also what de-motivates them, you’ll be well on your way to finding more of your ideal client.

And the advice I gave the observer? Straight out of our local BNI culture.  Ask that person – “If you were doing something that might make it more difficult to refer you or do business with you, would you want me to tell you?” – And then let them decide.

I’ll be curious to find out what happened.

Why Telling People What You Do Too Soon Can Sabotage Your Networking

January 25th, 2010

There are four words that, when strung together, are very dangerous – I already knew that.  Most of us know when we’re in a class or workshop it’s best not to be wearing our expert hat, but did you know it applies to talking about what you do?

When you’re out introducing yourself, remember that everyone you meet will be wearing their “expert hat” – their pre-conceived notion – about what your job title means.  If you tell some me you are a financial planner for example, most people think they know what that is, decide from past experience whether it applies to something they care about, and walk away from you if it’s not.

If, however you say something like, “I help baby boomer women achieve financial independence” (or something like that), your listeners “expert hat” will come right off because they won’t understand exactly what that is.

Case in point.  One of my students is a “holistic healer”.  She was at a networking event and someone asked her “what do you do?”  Fresh out of the workshop she really wasn’t sure what I taught her would actually work so she said, “I am a holistic healer”.  The person who she was talking to said, “Oh my gosh.  My mother went to a holistic healer and they said she was going to die within a year!”

OK – End of conversation.

Most of us know that’s not the kind of thing a holistic healer typically does.  Her listener had a misconception about the title because of a bad experience.  She had her “expert hat” on about what that profession meant, and since she was a bit traumatized by the experience, a further conversation would be problematic.

This same thing will happen to you no matter what your profession is if you introduce yourself and state your profession in the first two or three sentences.

If I told you I was a writer (which I am, by the way) what would you think?

Maybe I write romance novels, maybe newspaper columns or magazine ads.  I wouldn’t get to the part about what I actually do (teach people how to write and deliver elevator speeches). You would have already decided that I do what your “expert hat” has told you about what a writer does. You would have stopped listening and being curious because you thought you knew. Have you ever experienced this?

This is normal.  We all do it (even me) and doesn’t make you – or anyone else for that matter – a bad person. People are busy and have short attention spans. When we’re at an event it’s easy to be distractible.

Remember, when you introduce yourself.  Tell how you help people, who you help and who you are looking for.  You’ll meet allot of great people and maybe even get an introduction to your dream client!

Want to use this article in your newsletter or on your website? You can! Just be sure to include the entire article and include this complete “blurb” with it:

Networking Expert, Karen Frank publishes Networking News, a semi-monthly newsletter devoted to helping you avoid marketing disasters and networking faux pas.  Get the home study course “The Seven Deadly Sins of Networking and How to Avoid them” Free when you sign up for Networking News at www.misskarensproductions.com

The Secret Levels of Networking

January 16th, 2010

When people think of networking, typically they think about people going to chamber mixers and trying to find clients.  This fairly narrow definition of networking is, I think, one of the main reasons people get frustrated and give up.  This may be your experience too.

Recently something Alexandria Brown (the Ezine Queen) mentioned something in a teleclass that hit me – probably because I was NOT wearing my “expert hat” at the time.  She said something like – “If you don’t like your results when networking – change the networking you are doing”

This led to my “discovery” of the secret levels of networking.

Level One: Hanging out where your clients are and looking for new business

This is typically the chamber or another kind of party or mixer.n  This gains you visibility and perhaps credibility (if you are a stellar networker).  You can connect to people who might know clients for you and you might be able to rustle up a speaking gig if you make the right connection.

Upside – These are typically informal meetings and don’t require a strong commitment on your part. If you have family or a busy unpredictable schedule this can be a great way to get out and meet people.

Downside – Because of its informal structure, these can typically become social only events. You’re more likely to run into the pushy sales guy who hands his card to everyone he meets, people are less likely to have their “business hats” on, and sometimes – just sometimes the raffle takes more time than the time allotted for networking. Fun if you win – not fun if you don’t (and are standing too near the giant amplified speaker- ouch!)

Level Two: Hanging out where clients and people who know your clients are but in a structured environment

This is a business meeting such as the one BNI or LeTip or B2B offers.  Here you are expected to try to find business for fellow members, participate in the group and usually in return receive some business.

Upside - If you approach these kinds of meetings with the intention to stay in “for the long haul” – usually at least a year you will become part of the community, establish wonderful relationships with people and become a resource for your clients.  I’ve seen businesses get 10 to 90 percent of their annual revenue from such groups depending upon the type of business they have

Downside – It’s a fairly big commitment – typically weekly or at least monthly. It can feel pricey at first because you will be giving much more than you get – trying out other people’s services, paying meeting fees etc.  This would not be the kind of group to start with if you need cashflow right now – unless the group has a resource for business loans or a cashflow expert.

Level Three: Hanging out where people who know lots of your clients do

You can actually use the groups in Level Two to accomplish Level Three if you shift your thinking and remember to ASK for strategic alliance partners where you’re networking here.  Level three also includes giving talks or workshops to groups of your strategic partners, (and/or offering informational products for sale – for more information about informational products, see the audio recording links below).  It would also be why you might join a service organization or participate in an on line group such as yahoo.  If you’re going to do the yahoo thing join groups that you are genuinely interested in and participate in the conversations.

Upside – This is much less effort that trying to find clients one at a time and trying to find strategic partners one at a time.  This kind of strategy begins to place you in the position of “expert” in your line of work and helps you with your professional image in the community.

Downside – You need to be “on” at all times.  Dressing appropriately and behaving appropriately for the situation is key. You’ll destroy your reputation as quickly as you built if if you’re not aware of who you’re “showing up” at these events.  Remember – word of mouth marketing is always working – however it may NOT be working in your favor!

Level Four: Hanging out where people who understand the power of a strategic alliance are actively seeking out strategic partners

This is my absolute favorite. This is participating in education and classes with people who do business with the kinds of clients you have and may or not do what you do.  For example, I participated in a program that lasted about a year.  While I am not longer in the program, I still have relationships with several of the participants. Because we “are on the same page” and understand each others goals very well, it is natural for us to form strategic alliances.  Any time you participate in educational situations – whether they are live seminars, teleseminars, workshops or classes you have this opportunity. Remember everything you do is a networking opportunity.

Upside – Everyone is on the “same page” with you and forming alliance with people you’ve been though training with feels effortless. Often times in business seminars, the trainer spends time encouraging strategic alliances, so attendees are actively looking for this kind of opportunity.

Downside – You need to be willing to participate in the training.  If you go with the sole intention of networking and making connections, you’ll waste a great opportunity for self growth and it will be obvious why you’re there!

Bottom line – you could apply all four of the “secret levels of networking” to any situation.  Just remember when you’re out there doing that, stick to the problems you solve for people and focus on who you’re looking for.  You’ll be sure to be a networking ninja in no time!
Want to use this article in your newsletter or on your website? You can! Just be sure to include the entire article and include this complete “blurb” with it:

Networking Expert, Karen Frank publishes Networking News, a semi-monthly newsletter devoted to helping you avoid marketing disasters and networking faux pas.  Get the home study course “The Seven Deadly Sins of Networking
and How to Avoid them” Free when you sign up for Networking News at www.7deadlysinsofnetworking.com